They always say that everything will be alright in the end, if it’s not alright, then it’s not the end. It could’ve always been a great story (that must never be told), we just never know.
How can we love again when we can’t stop loving the one who has hurt us so much? It’s not too long ago that I would give up everything for one moment with you; for that one moment is better than a lifetime of never having that moment with you. I would rather risk my heart to the possibility of pain, than to never get the chance to love you again.
It’s not even about the hugs and kisses, the ‘I love you’s’ or the ‘I miss you’s', but about the warmth that hit every part of my spine when I think of you. It’s not who you are to the world, but it’s who you are to me. It’s not how many times I say I love you, but it’s how much I really do. You may have held my hand so seldom but you’ve just got a hold of my heart so tight that I saw myself still loving you. You may have hurt me so badly, many times, but all I can think about are the times you have made me smile. I can even feel every joy, sadness and pain you have as if they were my own. I didn’t just love you, I showed you love. Love me for a second, and I’ll give my heart unconditionally to make that second last a lifetime.
I needed many things to help me live or I may have other reasons to live, but I just need you too to make life worth living. My heart, my life, my soul, you have the key to them all. I always wear a fake smile on my face, but when you’re around its all real. The biggest of my smiles cannot be found upon my face, but locked inside my heart and can never be erased. Loving you has made my life complete!
It is not how I sincerely have forgiven you, but how I am able to forget, not what I just see in you but what I feel for you, not just how I tried to listen but how I earnestly understand everything about you, not how your faults and flaws are exaggerated but how I accept all of it and hope that I can help you change, become a better person and make life worth living, and not how I let go but how I hold on. I wish that you hold me close again… and this time never let go.
If you’ll ask me if I need you, FOREVER. If you’ll ask me if I’ll leave you, NEVER. If you’ll ask me who else in my life I value aside from my family and good friends, YOU. If you’ll ask me if I still love you, YES, I STILL DO. It’s strange, but true. And I think this time it’s not like when we were a little younger, growing old with the greatest lessons we have could bring us to a better relationship.
I admit, you are a big part of me and missing you means losing a big part of my LIFE. Honestly, I’ll never know if it is truly possible for me to stop thinking about you because I never tried. And I just realized, before I even regret of not doing this, that if I want to share the rest of my life with you, seriously, I’ve got to ask you now.
